Depression

I know many of us use the word " Depression"  lightly. We use it when we are sick sometimes, if we are a bit sad or feel upset or mad . If we are faced with a sad or tough situation and we couldn't apprehend it then we say we are depressed. 

We use the same Arabic word مكتئب , اكتئاب also very lightly. 

I know i do but i am trying to avoid such big words, cuz i believe of the power of words. And we shouldn't be disrespectful with illness that other may suffer severely with. 

But what is depression ? 

According to depressionalliance.org ,The word 'depression' is used to describe everyday feelings of low mood which can affect us all from time to time. Feeling sad or fed up is a normal reaction to experiences that are upsetting, stressful or difficult; those feelings will usually pass.

If you are affected by depression, you are not 'just' sad or upset. You have an illness which means that intense feeling of persistent sadness, helplessness and hopelessness are accompanied by physical effects such as sleeplessness, a loss of energy, or physical aches and pains.

Sometimes people may not realise how depressed they are, especially if they have been feeling the same for a long time, if they have been trying to cope with their depression by keeping themselves busy, or if their depressive symptoms are more physical than emotional.

Here is a list of the most common symptoms of depression. As a general rule, if you have experienced four or more of these symptoms, for most of the day nearly every day, for over two weeks, then you should seek help.

• Tiredness and loss of energy
• Persistent sadness
• Loss of self-confidence and self-esteem
• Difficulty concentrating
• Not being able to enjoy things that are usually pleasurable or interesting
• Undue feelings of guilt or worthlessness
• Feelings of helplessness and hopelessness
• Sleeping problems - difficulties in getting off to sleep or waking up much earlier than usual
• Avoiding other people, sometimes even your close friends
• Finding it hard to function at work/college/school
• Loss of appetite
• Loss of sex drive and/ or sexual problems
• Physical aches and pains
• Thinking about suicide and death
• Self-harm

i did feel some of these symptoms but mostly for a few days and not the whole day. But i guess i need to be more careful cuz this is not a children's game. 

The sad thing is that i guess i know some people who might suffer from depression without knowing. But what shall i do?  advice them to seek help , where ? and how ? 

Mental problems or diseases are a big thing here and people who see a shrink are always label to be "crazy" that's if they go in the first place. 

huffingtonpost.com has done a beautiful post on 10 things to say and not to say to someone with depression.

Here are the list:-

I'm Here For You

What to say:

You’re not alone in this.

What NOT to say:

There’s always someone worse off than you are.

( I tend to say that a lot which to think about it deeply hate to hear from others)

You Matter

What to say:

You are important to me.

What NOT to say:

No one ever said that life was fair

Let Me Help

What to say:

Do you want a hug?

What NOT to say:

Stop feeling sorry for yourself

( another guilty words of me)

Depression Is Real

What to say:

You are not going crazy.

What NOT to say:

So you’re depressed. Aren’t you always?

( i think about this all the time when i speak to someone about his problems though i never said it out loud but i guess people can feel our thoughts)

There Is Hope

What to say:

We are not on this earth to see through one another, but to see one another through.

What NOT to say:

Try not to be so depressed.

You Can Survive This

What to say:

When all this is over, I’ll still be here and so will you.

What NOT to say:

It’s your own fault.

I'll Do My Best To Understand

What to say:

I can’t really understand what you are feeling, but I can offer my compassion.

What NOT to say:

Believe me, I know how you feel. I was depressed once for several days.

( so bad ,so bad)

You Won't Drive Me Away

What to say:

I’m not going to leave you or abandon you.

What NOT to say:

I think your depression is a way of punishing us.

I Care About You

What to say:

I love you. (Say this only if you mean it.)

What NOT to say:

Haven’t you grown tired of all this “me, me, me” stuff yet?

We'll Get Through This Together

What to say:

I’m sorry that you’re in so much pain. I am not going to leave you. I am going to take care of myself, so you don’t need to worry that your pain might hurt me.

What NOT to say:

Have you tried chamomile tea?

**********************

So what do you think? are you guilty of any of those NOT TO SAY things. I am. 

But ,and not to defend myself, i guess sometimes that i am too down to even be able to help myself, let alone help someone else. Am I selfish? Are we ?

Shall we stop offering our help to those in need or even feeling down if we can not give it 100% ? 

Shall we be expert to know what to say and what not to say? 

Should we all learn more about such illness so we know how to deal with them? 

Sometimes i am too tired to help someone especially those who cry and complain all the time. I have my own load and i am down most times, life is not all smiles and joys. 

And i am one who doesn't express what i feel most times, yes i seem like to complain a lot in my blog, but this year is the only time i talk about stuff that happening in my life. Mostly i complain about public stuff but not what's inside of me. Even now when i cried my father i do it alone and no one knows about it. Lots of people think of me as "hard" cuz i don't show it and get so surprised when and if i show it. 

I don't know. I feel so sorry and upset over this one person i am sure is depressed but i think i can not help him anymore .