Minggu, 26 September 2010

10 Rules for Brilliant Women


 10 Rules for Brilliant Women .
And since you ALL are brilliant ones, ladies :) ,
then this is definitely are for you .

Read them And Embrace them.


I coach brilliant women, lots of them. Dedicated, talented, brilliant women.
Most of the time, they don't know their brilliance. They are certain they "aren't ready" to take on that next bigger role. They are more attuned to the ways they aren't qualified than to the ways that they are. They are waiting for someone to validate or discover them. Sound familiar?
It's a huge loss. Collectively, we miss out on the contributions of thousands of capable leaders. Brilliant women themselves miss out on the fulfillment that comes from using their abilities fully.

Let's set ourselves on a different path, with these 10 rules for brilliant women: 



1-Make A Pact
No one else is going to build the life you want for you. No one else will even be able to completely understand it. The most amazing souls will show up to cheer you on along the way, but this is your game. Make a pact to be in it with yourself for the long haul, as your own supportive friend at every step along the way.

2- Imagine It
What does a knock-the-ball-out-of-the-park life look like for you? What is the career that seems so incredible you think it's almost criminal to have it? What is the dream you don't allow yourself to even consider because it seems too unrealistic, frivolous, or insane? Start envisioning it. That's the beginning of having it.
  

 3-Supress Your Inner Critic
Start doing things that make you gasp and get the adrenalin flowing. Ask yourself, "What's the gasp-level action here?" Your fears and a tough inner critic will chatter in your head. That's normal, and just fine. When you hear that repetitive, irrational, mean inner critic, name it for what it is, and remember, it's just a fearful liar, trying to protect you from any real or seeming risks. Go for the gasps and learn how false your inner critic's narrative really is, and how conquerable your fears.

4- Get A Thick Skin
If you take risks, sometimes you'll get a standing ovation, and sometimes, people will throw tomatoes. Can you think of any leader or innovator whom you admire who doesn't have enthusiastic fans and harsh critics? Get used to wins and losses, praise and pans, getting a call back and being ignored. Work on letting go of needing to be liked and needing to be universally known as "a nice person." 
( my biggest problem which needs a long post <<< Wafa' Speaking :) ) 

 5-Be An Arrogant Idiot
Of course I know you won't, because you never could. But please, just be a little more of an arrogant idiot. You know those guys around the office who share their opinions without thinking, who rally everyone around their big, (often unformed) ideas? Be more like them. Even if just a bit. You can afford to move a few inches in that direction.

 6-The Voice That Says, "I'm Not Ready Yet."
I know, I know. Because you are so brilliant and have such high standards, you see every way that you could be more qualified. You notice every part of your idea that is not perfected yet. While you are waiting to be ready, gathering more experience, sitting on your ideas, our friends referenced in rule five are being anointed industry visionaries, getting raises, and seeing their ideas come to life in the world. They are no more ready than you, and perhaps less. Jump in the sandbox now, and start playing full out. Find out just how ready you are.

7-Don't Wait For Your Oscar
Don't wait to be praised, anointed, or validated. Don't wait for someone to give you permission to lead. Don't wait for someone to invite you to share your voice. No one is going to discover you. (Well, actually, they will, but paradoxically, only after you've started boldly and consistently stepping into leadership, sharing your voice, and doing things that scare the hell out of you.)

 8-Filter Advice
Most brilliant women are humble and open to guidance. We want to gather feedback and advice. Fine, but recognize that some people won't understand what you are up to (often because you are saying something new and ahead of your time). Some people will find you to be not their cup of tea. Some will feel threatened. Some people will want to do with your idea only what is interesting or helpful to them. So interpret feedback carefully. Test advice and evaluate the results, rather than following it wholesale.

 9-Recover And Restore
If you start doing the things that make you gasp, doing what you don't quite feel ready to do, and being more of an arrogant idiot, you are going to be stretching out of our comfort zone--a lot. Regularly do things that feel safe, cozy, and restorative. Vent to friends when you need to. Acknowledge the steps you've taken. Watch your tank to see how much risk-taking juice you have available to you. When it's running low, stop, recover and restore.

 10-Let Other Women Know They Are Brilliant
Let them know what kind of brilliance you see, and why it's so special. Call them into greater leadership and action. Let them know that they are ready. Watch out for that subtle, probably unconscious thought, "because I had to struggle and suffer on my way up...they should have to too." Watch out for thinking this will "take" too much time - when the truth is it always has huge, often unexpected returns.

Source : HuffingtonPost

13 komentar:

  1. i do no.2 very often,still there's no action,i guess i'll have to work on the other nine tips as well.lol
    thanks for the tips,,, i promise u i'll try harder

    BalasHapus
  2. Thank you for sharing! I really really struggle with number 4 as well. Though I think I would benefit from working on most of these.

    BalasHapus
  3. haha i like "be more of an arrogant idiot", my brother was telling me to stop beeing so nice, lol lovely post
    xx
    naz@somalianarab.blogspot.com

    BalasHapus
  4. Hi Fofo :D

    I wish doing this stuff was as easy as saying it!lol
    I never learn from these steps and tips unfortunately,I have to
    get in the experience-->get my butt kicked-->and then learn
    it's the only process that seems to make me learn to do these tips or anything that I'm supposed to do or be,other than that talk is cheap!

    BalasHapus
  5. nissan,

    it's tough one and depressing too.
    But i got it cuz i do that sometimes.

    i truly believe in you dear and know that you will try the best you can :)

    And you are welcome :)

    BalasHapus
  6. Becky,

    i guess we really need to work on each one especially the ones we lack or have.

    And you are welcome :)

    BalasHapus
  7. Naz,

    when i first read the title "be more of an arrogant idiot" it shock me , lol, but we do know a lot like this, right?

    but don't stop beeing nice, you are a sweet lady :)

    BalasHapus
  8. Rain,

    Hello darling :)

    but is not life too short to have to experience everything ourselves !!!

    you have to try to learn from other'sexperience , it would save you the trouble.

    BalasHapus
  9. ahlan ya 7olwa!
    bil 3ax!life is too short not to live the experience yourself!
    if you spend your whole time watching other people's lives you will never get to have one,besides being in a trouble is so much fun!you should try it! :D

    But in the other hand some mistakes we can't afford to commit ourselves so yeah...I partially agree :)

    BalasHapus
  10. http://dafdoo3ah-diary.blogspot.com/2010/09/tag-again.html

    BalasHapus
  11. Rain,

    there are a few experiences that i rather not live myself, thank you :P

    trouble is so much fun !!! i used to say the same when i was your age. But i changed my mind completely.

    And thanks for the link :)

    BalasHapus
  12. Wow, thanks for sharing my article. I'm delighted that it reached from San Francisco, California to you!
    Warmly,
    Tara

    BalasHapus
  13. Tara,

    wow, i can not believe that the writer herself is here !!!
    honestly i am delighted to have found you and your great article.

    Thanks a lot :)

    BalasHapus